My First Ever Dumbass Awards

Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, for being here today. Today we celebrate the dumbest of the dumb. It was a large category with many qualified nominations. The decision was tough, but we've finally come up with a winner. The first Barbarian Dumbass Award goes to Ben Roethlisberger for his ignorance and arrogance in motorcycle safety.

Ben hasn't been a bright boy since birth, but his talent at throwing a ball garnered him an incredible paycheck, fans, respect, and a Superbowl ring. Considered lucky by roughly 82% of the population, Ben was in a position to sit pretty for the rest of his sports-shortened life. Now he's thrown it all away because he doesn't like wearing a helmet. That, ladies and gents, is as dumb as a dumbass can get. Congratulation, Ben, on this fine award. We hope you have enough brain activity left to appreciate it.

Other nominees:
S-A-T-A-N

That'll be $19.95

Baby on Board

Woof

Gee Whiz