Therapy

Therapy can be over rated. I can't speak for anyone but myself, but the one time in my life when I found myself in a group therapy session, I realized very quickly that the ladies in that group were feeding each other's fear and anger. If someone walked into that room feeling pretty good about themselves and their future, they would leave afraid to walk to their car alone. What good was that? Where was the "help" these sessions were supposed to give? Instead, these ladies gave each other new excuses to continue their old behavior.

I left and never returned. I am better off for it. True, the next seven years of my life were the worst I have every experienced, but salvation is not found by walking the easy path. I just needed to find the right person to help me grow and change, and I did. Then I married him.

If you are in therapy and find yourself feeling worse after a session, you need to find another group. Needy, greedy people have a tendency to hang out in therapy. They need the attention and they really don't give a crap about anything but that. The "Gimme" person. Gimme's do not belong in therapy, but it seems that's where they breed. They get jealous when someone else is "upping" them, then they do what they can to tear that person apart. They view group session as their very own stage with a captive audience. I refuse to stick around and watch the show.

I don't want you to think I am poo-pooing group therapy as a whole. I'm not, some people find it very helpful. But just like everything else, it really depends on who you have in your group. You need a strong leader who can keep the group focused and calm people down when things get hot. An IMPARTIAL leader who has preferably had training. The people in your group need to listen as well as they talk. They need to be open-minded and courteous. Conflicts will arise, but how those conflicts are handled is so important. If you have a shitty group, your getting shitty therapy.

My issue, the one that I went to the group for, was solved by me. I didn't know it so well then, but I am a strong person with a solid sense of what I can and can't control. I don't feel guilty for things that happen to me. I don't have to have someone to blame when things go wrong. I can take a bad experience, chew on it for a while, then spit it out and go on with my life. If I had been able to communicate this to the group so long ago, they probably would have tarred and feathered me.