Stupid is as Stupid Does

We are having a graduate student recruiting weekend here at my university and one of our invited guests missed her flight. How can you miss a flight? Did you not know it was coming? Did you think the plane was a private jet waiting for you to show up whenever you damn well felt like it? How, HOW can you miss a flight?

When it comes to this department, graduate student positions are limited. It's up to the professor to decide who he takes on and how many students he needs. Therefore, during this grad. recruiting, it is our job to show the students how lucky will be to get hired, and it is their job to prove to us that they deserve it. I know that sounds harsh, but this ain't no community college. Our name on your resume is a very big deal.

So when we invite you to come visit us it is a privilege. We don't invite just anybody. You have to have some pretty impressive test scores, a lot of experience, very good references, and research that will fit into the discipline of the existing research we are already conducting. We pay for everything; flight, hotel, meals, transportation, entertainment, and a pretty good gift bag. All these students have to do is catch their flight. That's it.

She couldn't do something that simple. The girl who missed her flight had horrible test scores, little experience, and her research isn't that ground breaking. She was invited as a favor to an old associate who vouched for her character. Her excuse? "I was just late." Oh, well, that explains everything! This girl now has a -100% chance of being accepted here. She is looked upon as a waste of time, money, and energy. Who's impressed by irresponsibility? If you can't catch a flight, you ain't touching my cancer research, hear?

Life's lesson: don't be lazy.