Outta Me Way
I am an aggressive driver. I know this. If I have to get from point A to point B I will try to do it as quickly as I can. I change lanes. I speed. I yell and scream at people in my way. On rare occasions I will drive like a law-abiding citizen. But mostly I'm hell on wheels.
My husband, on the other hand, is a wild card. Sometimes he will drive like a bat out of hell, but other times...POKEY! One time we were coming to a light. There were two lanes. One lane had one car in it, the other had eight. So he picks the long lane. What the fuck? That lane has one car, ONE. And he seems to form love affairs with lanes sometimes, refusing to switch lanes no matter how slow the cars in front of him are going and how clear the other lanes around him are.
This morning he was driving me to work and I swear he was doing it on purpose. We got stuck behind some slow bitch and he WOULD NOT go around her. Doe-de-do, we'll just poke along, it's not like I have to get to work ON TIME or anything.
This, THIS is what really messes me up. When I come to a situation where there is a stopped car or a long line in front of me, I will check my mirrors and get over so I can pass said problem without having to slow down or stop. Not hubby! Oh no, he'll keep on going until he has to stop, then he'll check mirrors and see if he can get over. By this time the cars who drive like me are whizzing by and he has to wait until the damn lane is clear, clear, clear. Arg!
Yet if there is a fine film of water on the road he suddenly becomes a race car diver. Snow? Even faster. It's a crap shoot. With me you know I'm crazy. With him it's take what you get.
My husband, on the other hand, is a wild card. Sometimes he will drive like a bat out of hell, but other times...POKEY! One time we were coming to a light. There were two lanes. One lane had one car in it, the other had eight. So he picks the long lane. What the fuck? That lane has one car, ONE. And he seems to form love affairs with lanes sometimes, refusing to switch lanes no matter how slow the cars in front of him are going and how clear the other lanes around him are.
This morning he was driving me to work and I swear he was doing it on purpose. We got stuck behind some slow bitch and he WOULD NOT go around her. Doe-de-do, we'll just poke along, it's not like I have to get to work ON TIME or anything.
This, THIS is what really messes me up. When I come to a situation where there is a stopped car or a long line in front of me, I will check my mirrors and get over so I can pass said problem without having to slow down or stop. Not hubby! Oh no, he'll keep on going until he has to stop, then he'll check mirrors and see if he can get over. By this time the cars who drive like me are whizzing by and he has to wait until the damn lane is clear, clear, clear. Arg!
Yet if there is a fine film of water on the road he suddenly becomes a race car diver. Snow? Even faster. It's a crap shoot. With me you know I'm crazy. With him it's take what you get.
posted by Barbarian02003 | Wednesday, March 01, 2006
4 Comments:
A horribly sore subject with my wife and myself. Bottom line? You don't like his driving, YOU drive or realize thats what you're getting with him behind the wheel.
Im sorry, normally I agree 100% with you, but this one, uh-uh. I drive how I drive because its how I drive well. I push that and i hit stuff. I dont enjoy hitting stuff, so I drive how I drive.
I just like being mean to random strangers. Can't blame a guy who doesn't want to piss off the population like I do. I love his slow, non-lane changing, stuck behind the school bus self.
i stopped at a yellow light the other day, it wasn't the yellow light you go through, its the light that is about to turn red and will be red IF you try going through it.
Some bitch behind me honked her horn, as if that rotten sack of turd had any place more important to go than anybody else on the road.
I hate people. They are inconsiderate, selfish, and most of all stupid... well maybe selfish most of all... maybe its a tie.
oh... and I like how you are the yin to his yang... but just to be clear... lets never talk about his yang again!
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